The Nelson Narrative

Today is the 5-year anniversary of my embryo transfer!  5 years ago today I became pregnant with my girls (I wrote about it in more detail a few years ago).  It was a Saturday that year, also. Olivia and Kayley at 3 days post conception (wish I knew which one was which): And Olivia and Kayley 5 years later: That photo is actually a few weeks old.  I tried to take one for today and this is what I ended up with: {Sigh}

I'm very bitter.  There.  I said it.  I'm so very thankful for my precious girls and realize how blessed I am to finally have them, but I'm still bitter and wonder if I might always be.  Infertility (IF) has a way of making people that way.  Once we finally succeed in having a family we think we are "over it", and for the most part we are.  I can finally go to baby showers and birthday parties again.  But then certain things, like NIAW or a pregnancy announcment (they still bug me!  Way less than before but still) can trigger a whole flood of memories and feelings. I'm bitter because I never got to do this the "normal" way.  Before IF I used to look forward to the time when my husband (whoever and wherever he was) and I would start trying to have a baby.  I wondered what it would be like to ditch the pills and watch the calendar and have purposely unprotected sex on a certain day or two and then wonder, "did we just make a b...

Anyone dealing with infertility has received their fair share of ignorant, insensitive, or just plain pointless comments or suggestions.  My boss once told me to "just do it in the back of a Chevy.  Seems to work for all the teenagers..."  Gee, thanks, but first of all my eggs are a LOT older than those of said teenagers, and I really don't think having sex in a car is going to override my endometriosis and egg quantity/quality issues.  Sigh.  I mean, he really was a great guy and I get that he was just trying to be funny but it really was just annoying and hurtful. The following is a list of what not to say (and what's ok to say) to an infertile couple and is taken from www.dreambaby.com/do-not-say.htm Don't ask a childless person when they are going to have a child. They may be going through the process of trying to conceive but have not yet achieved success. Asking them only reminds them of their problem. They need no extra reminders. Do...

Today starts NIAW.  I will be dedicating my blog to this cause for the next 7 days in hopes of raising awareness.  Infertility is a heart- and gut-wrenching, emotionally draining, physical pain-causing (if undergoing certain treatments), horrible, life-sucking condition.  My personal battle was relatively short, but only because I wasn't in a position to "try" any sooner than I did.  If I had started trying years earlier, it would have been a much longer struggle.  In other words, I was infertile but just didn't know it yet (because I wasn't trying), although I did have suspicions because of other medical conditions and my age. The following is an excerpt from the RESOLVE website ( http://www.resolve.org/ ) : Infertility is a major life crisis for 1 in 8 couples. For these women and men fighting the disease of infertility, the infertility experience involves many hidden losses for the individuals, their loved ones and society as a whole, including: Loss ...