Friday, January 7, 2011

Potty Training Fiasco

Earlier this week, we attempted 3 Day potty training.  It was a disaster!  The premise is this:  you pick a day to start, build it up in advance by saying things like, "you're going to wear big girl underwear" and "you're getting so big you're not going to need diapers anymore", etc., then when the Big Day arrives, have them watch and/or help you throw away all the diapers, take them to the potty, dress them in big girl underpants (no Pull-ups or "training pants" of any kind) and pull-on pants (easy to pull up and down, vs. anything with a zipper and snap) and basically live in the bathroom for 3 days straight.

Monday was Day 1.  I skipped the ceremonious diaper throw-away (good thing) and just took them to the potty and got them dressed in their new Dora underwear.  A little while later I took them both to the potty again but they didn't need (or want) to go.  We had breakfast.  Just as I was about to take them again, they both wet themselves.  Rinse and repeat.  About 15 more times.  Kayley was doing just a little bit better than Olivia, so I decided it would be best to just concentrate on her and Olivia was back in diapers by noon.

By the end of day one, Kayley had gone through about 8 changes of clothes (I don't know, I didn't really keep track, but it was a lot) and I wasn't about to put them to bed without a diaper on, despite what the book says about "confusing" them.

On Day 2, I kept just missing, again.  I would be just about to take her and she would pee in her pants.  After about 4 or 5 times of that, I actually got to her in time, put her on the potty and she wouldn't go.  Not 2 minutes later, wet pants!  That was it, and back in diapers she went.

I'm sure the author (of the book Potty Train in 3 Days) would say that I gave up too soon, I instilled doubt in them by putting them back in diapers, etc, but I just couldn't take it anymore.  I was almost in tears, feeling like a HUGE failure, because I've read so many success stories from others and also because according to the author, if this method doesn't work your child(ren) either has a learning disability (such as ADHD) or is just "willfully noncompliant...due to the parents' failure to require cooperation in any other area of her life."  My girls are very compliant (ok, sometimes compliant) in other areas, so I don't think it's that.  And I really don't think they have ADHD, as they could sit in front of the TV all day if I let them.  So, what the...?

I will admit that I didn't follow it TO THE T, but still.  I didn't make a big deal about throwing away the diapers, and I have a bad habit of asking them if they want/need to go potty, which you're not supposed to do.  But I would take them anyway, even if they said no, so I don't think that had much to do with it.  I think I really just needed to take her even more frequently.  I honestly think I pretty much needed to not leave her side all day, whereas I was still going about my daily chores, etc. and ended up waiting too long in-between attempts (hard to believe 20 minutes is too long, but then again I sometime pee every 5 minutes, like if I've had a diet coke or lots of water).

Anyway, we're going to take a break for awhile and try again in early February.  Not sure if we'll try the 3 Day method again, or just try something else.  Grrrr...


Sara said...

I feel for you! I am feeling the exact same way. In fact, so far, I hate potty training with a passion. We have had 6 puddles on the floor and once Izzy climbed into the bathtub to pee. Talk about a confused mom. I think she knew not to go on the floor, but the potty just didnt look inviting? I don't know. I'm going to wait a little while too. Here's to diapers for a few more weeks and a house not smelling of pee. :)

MultipleMum said...

Toilet training kids is a shocking job. I really wish it were outsourcable because I would totally pay someone to do it!

I am dreading doing it with my twins.

I have always read that it is best to wait until the child shows interest. In my eldest child's case I reckon I would still be waiting! I finally trained him when he was nearly 3 and a half and I was 6 months pregnant with the twins. There was no way I was having four children in nappies! Three was bad enough. It was a breeze because he was more than capable.

Number 2 trained himself at 2 and a bit. No troubles, just really annoying because I was breastfeeding twins while assisting with toilet training. We had potties all over the house!

Who knows what lies ahead with the twins but I am hoping for no more day time nappies by this time next year!

Good luck!