Thursday, February 25, 2010

Blessed

Back in the mid-90s Elton John came out with a song called "Blessed".  It refers to an as-yet-unconceived but much anticipated child.  At the time I was about 26 or 27, single and very concerned for my own ability to marry and have children by, say, my early 30s, which at the time was my "deadline".  I had recently moved to a new city and didn't know many people, and the people I did know were guys that I worked with (no girls to go out with to meet men).  Years later I would discover several social clubs/organizations through which I would meet lots of people but at the time I didn't know of them and had a hard time meeting potential dates.  The 50 or so extra pounds that I would eventually lose 35ish of probably didn't help, either.  Anyway, while I did really enjoy being single, especially later when the above-mentioned people-meeting improvements were made, as the years ticked by I grew more and more worried that by the time I finally got married I would be too old to have kids and I would obsess about it all. the. time.  (Turns out I had every reason to be worried, as, lo and behold I wouldn't marry until I was 37 and, well, the rest is on the right side of my blog.)  So when this song came out, I couldn't believe how right-on the lyrics were for what I was feeling about my future child(ren).  I dedicated it to him/her/them then, all those years ago.  When I first found out I was pregnant I played this song for them in my car as tears streamed down my face and would play it for them in the womb many times after that.  But I always wanted to write them a letter to explain all of this so hear it is.  So Olivia and Kayley, in honor of your 2nd birthday, this is for you:

Hey you, you're a child in my head
You haven't walked yet
Your first words have yet to be said
But I swear you'll be blessed

I know you're still just a dream
Your eyes might be green
Or the bluest that I've ever seen
Anyway, you'll be blessed

And you, you'll be blessed
You'll have the best
I promise you that
I'll pick a start from the sky
Pull your name from a hat
I promise you that, promise you that, promise you that
You'll be blessed

I need you before I'm too old
To have and to hold
To walk with you and watch you grow
And know that you're blessed

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