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Disgusted

I haven't talked weight loss in awhile, mainly because there's none to talk about!  After having an awesome May, losing 9.2 pounds, including 2 while on vacation in Hawaii, I have since gained most of it back.  Last I knew, anyway, I had gained back around 6, and I'm not sure if I've gained any more or not because I'm too scared to weigh myself.  For some reason I have just been horrible since early June and I can't seem to get back on track.  So today I'm hoping to make a fresh start.  I'm just so disgusted, once again, that I let this happen.  Before the 9 pound loss I was struggling for the longest time with just losing and regaining the same 3 or 4 pounds over and over.  I never gained 6, just 3 or 4, every time.  Why couldn't I have only gained 3 or 4 this time, instead of 6?  Then I would still be down 5 or 6 instead of only 3 or less.  Grrr.
Also, while I've still been exercising fairly regularly, I haven't really been running very much.  Ever since I finally completed C25K several months ago I haven't been keeping up with it, let alone working up to 3 miles (when I left off I could run for 30 minutes/between 2.25 and 2.5 miles).  Now, when I run I only run anywhere from 10-20 minutes.  So, I'm going to start C25K again, but this time instead of running for time, I'm going to run for distance.  So, for instance, if it says to run 5 minutes or 1/2 mile, I'm going to run 1/2 mile (which will take me longer than 5 minutes) instead of just 5 minutes.  And I'm not going to start at the very beginning but at about week 4.  Let's hope I can turn this around.  I was SO close to fitting into some summer clothes I haven't worn in a long time and now I've ruined my chance and will have to hope for NEXT summer.  Sigh.
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